From Pink Elephants to Yellow Bugs

Alas the Spring soccer is upon us and we kicked off the new season with a new name.  Since, having a team name is one of my top tips to a successful under 5 team establishing the name early is important. In the fall we went with "Pink Elephants" due to the remarkable coincidence that our jerseys were pink and had elephants on them. Surprisingly, our jerseys are yellow with lady bugs on them so shockingly we are now the "YELLOW BUGS"!!!

I have mentioned this before, but I grade my coaching performance on a couple of ultra analytical measures requiring various algorithms and non-differential linear equations.  The first being how many kids came back.  We had seven girls, including my own, on the team in the fall.  We have all seven, including my own (as much as she would want to go elsewhere) back on the team again.  Success!  Honestly, I don't think it says much about the success or failure of my coaching abilities but I think it speaks to the communication I try to keep with the parents and the amount of fun I try to bring to every game and practice we have.

If you are an overly competitive jerk (I am a recovering competitive jerk) and base success on wins and losses then this season is off to a smashing start.  We played the only team that beat us last year. They have a couple of kids with the foot skills to do step overs and half garrinchas while maintaining possession and kicking while they are running.  For most of my girls keeping the ball close and being able to shield the defender away is a small feat.  Well, that was last year.  Now, almost all my girls and maintain possession and I have two that can actually out run defenders while they are dribbling.  Pretty sweet action!  Anyway, my little one was able to put two in the back of the net and my pocket Ace, Suzie, was able to make four goals.  Four goals, hell one was practically a half volley that went in the goal in the air.  That's amazing considering 95% of the kids at this age can't kick the ball off the ground unless by accident. 

The only downside to the start of this year was that some of the parents didn't recognize me without my luscious locks (see lasts years pic)

On the whole my new look lends to a bit more credibility and probably gives the parents more reassurance in who is leading their kids.

Here is to another great season for the Yellow Bugs!

My Little Judo Champion

The anticipation was killing me as we drove up from Kansas City to Kearney, Missouri for Ruby's first Judo tournament.  She had literally been asking me everyday for at least a month, how many days until her tournament and the day was finally here.  Having had at least four or five months of practice under her belt it was time to see if she could turn theory into action.  As we arrived in the high school I walked with the wife and kids over to the bleachers.  Once everyone was settled in I set out to scout out her bracket and the competition.  Not surprisingly, Ruby was the National Champion, as soon as we got there.  Being that there were no other 5 and under, less than 40 pound girls signed up, by default Ruby won her bracket and her first national championship. Unlike the Kansas Jayhawks, Ruby could just show and win the national championship...zing!

Considering my in-laws, my Dad and his wife, my brother and his wife and kids, Ruby's preschool teacher, and one cousin all came to the meet to watch I had to find at least one match for her.  I spoke with the tournament director and he told me that if I could find some kids and coaches who would be willing to set up an exhibition match then he would put it on the schedule.  Unfortunately, I could only find two boys, who were roughly her age and weight to match up with.  I would rather her fight only girls but she would have been heart broken if she didn't get a chance to shine. 

Her first match was against her practice partner, Peyton.  They are almost the exact same size and were excited to go against eachother.  The judge says "hajime" (begin) to start the match.  All of the commands are in Japanese and it's pretty cool to see the kids take right to it.  Ruby attempted her two throws she knows many times, but to no avail, she was forced to use her suffocating ground technique to subdue Peyton and get a 5-2 victory.  I don't even know if she realized she won but her and Peyton were smiling and laughing after it was over so I was happy. 

After waiting around two hours, it was time for her second match.  She was tired, having missed her nap, and not feeling very good. The fire in her eye from earlier was extinguished, I could tell this was going to be rough.  From the very beginning of the match, she was on the defensive, backing up, not being aggressive.  The little guy finally took her down and got her on her back, she would later claim she was being choked, which is not allowed until 12 years old, and was "pinned".  Any thought I had that she didn't really care about winning and losing was immediately erased when she knew she lost and broke down in tears.  Her coach came up to me later and said, "she doesn't like losing does she?" Absolutely not. 

By that point we had been there for almost six hours, got to watch her fight in two matches, and were ready to go home. She got to stand on top of the podium get her first place medal and ride off into the sunset.  Just before we left her coach told me that she would be getting her yellow belt at practice on Tuesday.  She is going to be thrilled.  What a great day with my little national champion.

Psycho Wyco Winter Edition - Killing me again...

They say the third time is the charm, I say things come in threes and are typically similar.  I had a history professor once tell me that history does not repeat but it rhymes.  This I believe.

I am a member of the Kansas City Trail Nerds http://www.psychowyco.com/ quite possibly one of the best organized, friendly, trail running advocate groups in the area. A classy operation with absolutely stellar volunteers. this organization puts on trail runs of varying distances from 5k to 100k all over the Midwest but principally the Kansas City/Lawrence Metroplex.  The Psycho Wyco Run Toto Run is in my backyard.  Located about fifteen minutes from my house and a place I can get lost in.  The phrase, "it's Kansas how hilly can it be" just sucks. Here check this out. Those runners are walkers on this.

Those hills are not only covered in snow they are steep.  Imagine if you will for a moment a roller coaster at some small, local amusement park. With dramatic hairpin turns, a loose almost out of control feel, with breathtaking drops and climbs all the while it just repeats that same pattern over and over and over. Then at the handle of the ride you have Bad Ben just dreaming up more difficult runs for these far to willing participants. That is the bridle trail at Wyandotte County Park.  Up one steep, snow caked side, down one steep snow covered chute on the other side and repeat for thirty miles.  My experience with during this run was much like my previous two, run 20 miles and call it a day.  At this point, after much introspection and pondering I have decided my performance in these races is attributable to a couple of things.  One I don't drink enough water.  Everyone else is constantly taking sips but I don't.  This is a bad habit I need to get out of but I'm only continuing a process I use in road races, but this is an entirely different animal and I better get hip to that quick.  Secondly, I have to stop asking my wife to come out with the kids. They are my inspiration for life and everything I do but I get concerned that they are going to have to wait for me and when I see them at mile twenty I just go home with them rather then put in another two or three hours. Next time, no kids or wife, I will just call when I am done. You can't really spectate anyway since we are running in the woods the whole time.  

What troubles me about this effort is I am and have been training all winter for an April marathon.  I ran a 3:19:ish and set my PR last marathon out and I have been logging 50 to 70 mile weeks pretty consistently.  I have the lungs for this and the strength but a combination of cramps and not wanting to deal with the pain for three more hours convince me to quit at twenty miles each time.  Such is life, I ran the next day and the day after that.  I read this today and thought I would share it. 

"Love the busy life. It is a joy-filled life. Take your fill of joy in the winter and spring. Live outdoors whenever possible. Sun and air are nature's great healing forces. That inward joy changes poisoned blood into a pure, healthy, life-giving flow."

Lastly a few keys are necessary for anyone thinking about running in one of the Trail Nerd races especially in the Winter Editions. 

1. Beards are awesome.  In one of my previous blog posts I wrote about the overwhelming power of facial hair but for running in the woods they provide another layer of fantasticness.  

Case in point: 

 The above tough man is Brian Kelpe.  As strange as this is we went to high school together in Cape Girardeau, MO.  He is fast and he won the 50k. That's right he won it and I'm sure that sweet ass beard had something to do with it.

 The incredibly handsome young man in the middle with blue shirt and black stocking cap is me.  I had the beginnings of a great beard.  Good enough to endow me with the strength for a top 20 in the 20 miler. Not a terrible days work.

 I have no idea who this guy is but all I can say is nice work, you are the man. 

While I could go on and on, just look at the pictures, check out the links, go to the trail nerd site and read the other blogs.  Lots of snow, ice, slush, hills, and fun.  It's not for the faint of heart but if being alone in the woods, surrounded by nature and peace, then come join the fun.  

 

The Wonders of Eye Tests and Glasses

I am lucky.  As much as I don't like to put much stock in luck, I have been lucky genetically when it comes to a few thing and sight is one of them.  I have never had to wear glasses or deal with the hassle of contacts.  My wife on the other hand has not been so lucky.  The reason I bring this up is the story of how we have even got to the place where vision can be tested and corrected is another example of the power of science and simplicity. 

Let us give credit to the Italians for their many advances to science. In conjunction with the Age of Enlightenment, during which new ideas about scientific subjects like earth sciences and astronomy were developed, optics became an important topic. Italian Salvino D’Armate of Florence is credited with inventing the first pair of wearable eyeglasses in 1284. It is said a memorial once stood, honoring him, but it no longer exists. Others, like Alessandro di Spina, were also given credit for the first eyeglasses, and though doubt exists as to the actual inventor, all prototypes were probably invented in Italy late in the thirteenth century. The use of eyeglasses was depicted in several artworks created in the fourteenth and fifteenth centuries, giving credence to the existence of spectacles during this period. http://www.glassescrafter.com/information/who-invented-eyeglasses.html

Emily, my wife, recently had to get glasses again. She had lasik surgery years ago but the vision in the right eye had been giving her problems. She had been getting headaches and squinting to see things when she read but she didn't know what the deal was.  I find this fascinating that people who have bad vision don't know it because they don't know any different.  This is why it's so important to have kids get their eyes checked.  They have no idea they can't see well so they have to have an eye test. The simplicity of the test is amazing. Cover one eye and read the letters.  While I don't want this to morph into a healthcare topic but the sooner children can get tested for vision problems the better.  Kids don't know they can't see the chalk board letters so they don't know they are missing out.  The advantages of good vision or having your vision corrected with glasses makes a big difference in your early educational development.

Long story short. Glasses are awesome.

The Fantastic Power of Beards

On Jan 1st 2011, I cut off my Sampson like locks to start a new.  While, I'm a bit disappointed that I actually did it, it was probably time.  The day following the haircut, we went to a birthday party for a one year old named Hank.  Many of our friends were there and it was a good time.  Most of our friends were a little taken a back by my new do but most of them have known me for quite awhile so it wasn't much of a surprise.  That is not to say that the relatives of the young lad really knew me from Adam. 

Well, it was time and Ruby drove that point home for me.  When everyone was gathered around the table for singing of Happy Birthday, one of the grandparents asked Ruby what my hair used to be like. She told them this, "my Dad used to have really long hair, he kind of looked like a girl." That's my Ruby, calling out my manliness in a room full of people.  If my own daughter is comparing my hair to a woman than it was probably time to get a cut.

In an effort to rebrand myself and restore my pride and dignity, I am growing an amazing beard.  It's pretty rough, all scraggly in length, and patchy; in other words awesome. It's like having machine guns on your face. My pride restored and my manliness radiating, enjoy...

Tied to a Tree

My mother-in-law was pissed at me on Sunday.  Typically, I can do something to upset her at least every six months or so with either my glacial pace to report an injury to one of the girls, or something about my dog.  I love my dog. She was given the name Mango Margaret Salsa by Ruby when she was just a wee lad.  She is the second yellow lab we have had and keeps our streak alive of around eight years with a yellow running around.

She is my dog.  As much as the girls and my wife like to say otherwise, she is devoted to me.  When we say grace we always open up the prayer at the end to some freestyle blessings.  One of the girls always gives thanks for Mango. Alice likes to tell us, "I love Ruby and Mommy and Daddy and Mookie."  Mookie is and has been what Alice refers to Mango as and if Alice happens to have food, Mango responds to her when she calls her that as well.

We adopted her from Animal Haven a rescue shelter located Kansas.  She was just a little puppy. She is no longer a little puppy.  She's pushing 90lbs and is solid as a rock.  Since she turned one she has been my faithful running companion.  Regardless of the weather or distance she is always right at the front door, tail wagging knocking stuff over, eager to bound off the porch and get her run on.  I have learned a couple of lessons throughout the 1000's of miles we have logged.

1. When it gets about 75 degrees she is good for only three miles.

2. When it is less than 30 degrees, she is good for up to 20 miles.

3. Pace matters. If I am out on a slow run 8:00 minutes a mile or more, she can keep up. If I'm running sub eights, she is only good for around five miles.

4. If she lays down and is panting like she's dying because it's hot as hell and I'm an idiot, she's probably having heat stroke and my wife is going to kill me if she dies.

I would write more on lesson four but let's just say, she didn't die, I didn't take her to the vet, I thought my wife was going to kill me, and I was secretly crying when I was trying to cool her off.   She made it and I did learn that she has limits.

Mango also fills me with pride.  She is the best running partner I have ever had, including humans. I typically take her off the leash after one mile in, even if we are running in a busy residential or commercial area.  She sticks either right next to me or right behind me but nothing, not even squirrels, cats, other dogs, or food will pull her off the run.  It's like she knows what we are out there doing and doesn't want to screw it up by going off course.  That is not to say she doesn't stop to smell the roses every once in awhile, she does, but she catches back up and we carry on.  I love running past people on a trail who have their dogs on leashes and she is free.  Mango pays them no mind and they stare at me like I'm the dog whisperer.  In all fairness, she has been like this for me as long as I have had her and I can't take any credit.

She also loves to race.  We entered the spring edition of the Psycho Wyco 5K last year and had a blast.  There were about 100 runners total and about 15 of us had dogs.  All the owner/dog teams had to start in the back.  While in theory this is a good idea, in practice it's terrible.  This race is over a extremely rugged single track trail in the woods.  Passing is treacherous at best and passing with a giant dog on a leash is complicated to say the least.  My method was just to yell really loud, "DOG COMING!" and hope they moved out of the way.  Even after starting a good two or three minutes after the leaders we passed 88 runners and finished 12th OVERALL and first dog in.  Watching her run up hills is like watching a primal beast in it's element.  She was built for this and we killed it. When we hit the finish line a guy said to me, maybe you should start in the front next year.  I agree.

Now, it's the dead of winter again and I'm training for my next marathon.  This past Sunday was my long run of 14 miles.  I knew I wanted to run it just a little off of marathon pace or 7:30 to 7:45 a mile and that was going to be way too fast to take Mango with me. The problem is as soon as she sees me getting dressed to run she knows what up.  She bounds over to the front door and starts going nuts.  She just stares at me with those giant eyes and how can I not take here with me. 

Off we go, she hustles along for the first 3 miles or so and then we hit this really long straight away.  It is in a unpopulated area so I don't mind her falling far behind because she can still see me.  Well, we hit the seven mile turn around and she is falling almost a quarter of a mile behind me.  What to do? I run a few more miles and I wait for her to catch up, we hike about 30 yards off the road into the woods and I tie her to a tree.  I pick up the pace for my last four miles and get home, grab the keys, drive back to the country road, hike into the woods, unhook her from the tree and she jumps into the car.  All is well.  I thought this was a pretty quick thinking on my part until I told my mother-in-law of my great idea at Sunday night dinner.

"You are an idiot" she says. "What if someone would have taken her or she froze to death?"

Both highly unlikely possibilities given that someone would have had to have been searching in the woods for a dog tied to a tree that they didn't know existed and secondly she just ran nine miles and was panting like hell and had a fluffy bed of snow to lay in.


While in retrospect, my decision to take her in the first place was the wrong choice but leaving her tied to a tree was pretty awesome.